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Ask The Band: Can Someone *Want* To Be Abused?

At The Band we understand that sometimes, we need answers to questions that we can’t ask our friends and loved ones. Sometimes, we need to crowdsource an idea.
This is his question, and I’d love you guys to try to help him understand.

can someone want to be abused

 

I am a man in my forties and I just saw a couple of my house guests who were probably in their twenties: a man and a woman.

The woman seemed stressed and uncomfortable (maybe it was the party?) and I observed her picking on her boyfriend for over an hour. I don’t mean beating or hitting him, I just mean she was emotionally abusive. She escalated her insults, mocked him, and made sure to push all of his buttons.

Until he backhanded her across the face.

can someone want to be abused

After she was slapped, she was relaxed and visibly more calm, and more pleasant.

I cannot understand this kind of behavior; why would someone want to be abused?

Can someone want to be abused?

Can anybody enlighten me?