Here at The Band, we believe in kicking stigmas to the curb, flinging glitter, and shining a light into the dark. And now?
Your bandmate needs a sounding board.
It’s time to Ask The Band!
My five-year old son punched me in the nose this morning.
He was tired and frustrated and I was trying to rush him out the door. He gets his temper from me. None of this excuses what he did, but at least I can understand.
I thought, Wow, being punched in the face is a great way to start the day. This will obviously be a shit day.
I had no idea.
That afternoon, I got a call from the doctor’s office. My culture came back.
Two weeks ago I had sex for the first time in years, since getting divorced from my son’s father.
We’ve been seeing each other ever since. We’ve been an official couple for a week.
After the sex, I got a Urinary Tract Infection. I was uncomfortable, in pain, and I couldn’t sleep. It’s been two weeks, and I still haven’t slept much.
Now I get a call from the doctor’s office, and it turns out I have herpes.
I want to die.
Instead, I am sitting at work in tears.
He says he didn’t know he had it. We used a condom, but he performed oral sex on me. That’s the only way this could have happened.
I like him. At least, I think I do. He’s sweet and nice and he’s been treating me the way I wish my ex-husband had.
Do I still?
I don’t know. I feel like I can’t know.
Tears are rolling down my cheeks.
He’s out of the state for work for the next week. He sent me a text message a bit ago. I told him to fuck off. He called me. I told him the culture came back positive, but I couldn’t say what it was positive for out loud. I’m at work. I’m embarrassed.
I feel dirty, worthless, and disgusting.
Do I stay with him? Do I forgive him for something he didn’t know about?
Help me, The Band.
I need to know that I’m not alone, that I’m not dirty, and that there is a chance for me to still find happiness.