Hey, The Band, I’ve got a question. Can you help me?
My 24-year old daughter who is bipolar with psychosis or schizoaffective – we’re not sure because she is an adult and changes what she says are the diagnoses – went dark in texts and social media 2 days ago.
She went to live with her father, who just got back out of the hospital for another bipolar episode, but didn’t let me know.
I have custody of her son. He wanted to call Mommy and tell her goodnight.
We couldn’t get any info for two days.
Here is my rub.: I know my daughter needs help, but they want to blame me for never letting her “find herself;” that she is capable if we just let her be.
In my opinion, she has a severe mental illness that needs supervision.
I would love for her to be able to live independently, be clean, take care of her son, but that is not the case. I feel left to try and make a life of uncertainty.
Should I get a bigger house? (mine suits me fine, but my grandson needs a yard).
Should I continue him at his school and let him attach to friends and community members?
I don’t blame you for feeling lost. I would too.
Here’s my take, and feel free to ignore it. Unless she’s an active danger to herself or other people or if she’s mentally incapacitated, she is an adult which means she has to make her own decisions.
For your grandson, it’s your duty as his guardian to take care of him. I personally would get him established wherever you are and give him the stability kids need so much.
I wish you the very best.
I’m sorry you’re going through this, and her son as well. This must be one of the harder things to witness.
Okay, first of all, who’s “they”? Second, have you considered a supportive living facility? Not somewhere she can never leave, just somewhere she can learn and practice skills and healthy living. Have you heard from her since she went dark? Is she safe, at least?