Yesterday I wrote to the Band “One Year Ago” about the simple kiss that destroyed my life. Today, I get the news: the man who kissed me just got engaged to his partner over the weekend. The timing, or irony, is not lost on me.
I don’t know why God is punishing me this way. I can barely breathe or see straight from the heartbreak.
I now realize I’ve been lying to myself and everyone. He’s not just a friend. I love him so deeply with all my heart. I am crushed beyond words. I would indeed have left my husband for him. My marriage is already on the rocks because of that kiss, and my husband has no idea why I’m so distant.
Christopher, I truly and honestly love you. Please, please, please don’t marry her. She blames you for the death of the cat, and for so many, many things. She will never forgive you, and marrying her won’t make up for it. I haven’t been able to tell you because you refuse to believe me. My heart is simply bleeding. I am the only person who truly stood by you this past year. Why can’t you see that? Why can’t you believe me?