Being a caregiver to a loved one is one of the most gut-wrenching things a person has to do.
This is her story:
I’ve been contemplating blogging for quite sometime. I’ve been afraid to for several reasons, but to rattle off a few: anonymity, vulnerability, and pure avoidance. I have a fear that if I actually put the feelings/circumstances/questions out there, it means I actually have to deal with them. Thank you Aunt Becky for starting this blog…so I can get my toes wet.
From what I can tell of this space, many are dealing with loss, mostly stemming from the unfathomable experiences associated with childbearing/loss/postpartum/depression and the host of other issues those of us who are now “adults” face. I would like to add another sad layer to party – dealing with caring for someone whose mind and spirit are being slowly ripped away through Alzheimer’s Disease.
My mother, the beautiful, talented, smart, amazing hero of my world, is slipping away. I cannot say things like…she has had a full life, this is part of getting older etc. You see, she’s only 61 years old. We are at least 5 years into this battle (it took most of those 5 years just to get a diagnosis) and it feels like this freight train is traveling full force. Every day, for my mom, is the best it will ever be. Tomorrow, some different aspect of the person she is today will be gone. For now, she knows me, she knows my kids, she know she is my mom. She doesn’t remember where she lives, when the last time she talked to me was, whether or not she fed the dog (yes, at least 5 times now) or how old the kids are, let alone that she just told me the same story for the tenth time in a single conversation. It can be so frustrating, but I have to constantly remind myself…today is as good as it gets.
I need an outlet…and hope this can be one. Caregiving, whether its for an infant, child, spouse, sibling or parent, means giving more of ourselves than we ever thought we could give.
And that comes at a price. I look to you, fellow fighters, for insight, laughs and support. I promise to give it all back.
Miscarriage is the term for a pregnancy that ends on its own within the first twenty weeks of gestation. Miscarriage is the most common type of pregnancy loss, yet one of the most misunderstood and often glossed-over types of loss. An early pregnancy loss is an often viewed as a discounted loss.
It’s time to break down that stigma and talk openly about miscarriages, the loss we feel, and how we can help a friend who is mourning an early pregnancy loss.
Read more clinical information about miscarriage here.
This page isn’t intended to be clinical – it’s how to help yourself – or someone else – cope with a miscarriage.
Miscarriages are a fact of pregnancy. It happens. It’s the most common complication of early pregnancy. Oftentimes nobody knows why. Unfortunately, it’s something that happens to a lot of women.
In fact, between 20 percent and 25 percent of pregnancies end in miscarriage, three percent of them after 16 weeks. One minute someone’s life is filled with expectations of a new baby, a new family member! Someone mom had real hopes and dreams for. Pretty much every waking minute while pregnant is devoted to thinking about their baby, and then the next minute it’s all gone.
It’s tough to know what to say when a friend breaks the news. Traditionally, women wait until they’re three months along before sharing the news, but increasingly, women are telling their big news before then. This, I believe, is a very good thing.
Women originally wanted to wait until they learned the baby made it past the risky first trimester. But what if she does miscarry? She carries her grief alone? The statistics tell us that’s a lot of women carrying a very heavy burden without support. We think telling people about the pregnancy earlier is better. If you do miscarry, you have a support group to help you through something that hasn’t always been recognized as the extremely difficult event that it is.
Women who miscarry haven’t always been offered the same level of sympathy and comfort as a woman who lost a child that’s been born. Most miscarriages happen early in the first trimester, so the mom-to-be doesn’t look pregnant. That, coupled with the fact that there is no body to bury, causes people to forget a woman is actually mourning the very real and very painful loss of a child, not to mention the accompanying guilt that a woman who has had a miscarriage is likely to feel even though it isn’t her fault
How To Help Yourself While Grieving A Miscarriage:
Having a miscarriage or early pregnancy loss may bring about a whole host of emotions – sadness, guilt, anger, feelings of failure. The time following the loss may be incredibly painful, especially if this wasn’t your first pregnancy loss. You may feel withdrawn and unable to sleep. You may feel moody and unpredictable. The emotions you feel after a miscarriage are impossible to predict – each day may bring about new feelings.
Here are some ways to cope with a miscarriage.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve a miscarriage. Some people may be devastated, barely functional for months, while others feel it’s merely a blip on the radar. THAT IS OKAY. It does not mean that you are a “bad person” or that you weren’t meant to be a mother – it simply means that you’re grieving in your own way.
Remember, the miscarriage is not your fault. It is not due to anything you did wrong – miscarriages just happen. And coping with a miscarriage is really hard.
Ask a friend or trusted loved one to share that the pregnancy you’ve announced has ended if it’s too hard for you to talk about. There’s no shame in asking for help.
Allow yourself your feelings. It’s really easy to try to dismiss the early pregnancy loss as “being so early” or “better now than later,” but a loss is a loss. And every loss deserves to be grieved.
There is no timeline for grief. For some people, it’s a couple of days. Others grieve a miscarriage for several months. Some people may be devastated for much, much longer. Whatever your grief timeline is, accept it.
Take all of the time you need to grieve.
Don’t close yourself off from other people. Sometimes, it feels painful to talk about the pregnancy loss, but sharing your story – here on Band Back Together or elsewhere – can make you feel more connected to others who may understand what you are going through.
Take care of yourself. When you’re feeling at your absolute worst, it’s often hard to provide self-care, but that’s when it’s most important.
Don’t feel guilty about failing to meet your obligations. Take some time off work, take some time off from the housework, and give yourself permission to just be. Even if you’re physically well, taking some time to process the loss is very important.
If you feel up to it, do something with your hands. Plant a garden, bake some cookies, knit something. Sometimes, using your hands can free up your mind to process and heal.
Know and watch for the signs of postpartum depression in yourself, especially if this is your first child. Just because the pregnancy ended in miscarriage does not mean you are immune to postpartum issues. Read more about the signs and symptoms of postpartum depression here.
If you feel like you simply cannot cope with the loss of your baby, don’t hesitate to talk to a therapist. There is no shame in seeking help for being unable to cope with such a tragic loss.
If you’d like to, plan a small memorial service for your baby. Invite close friends and relatives and plant a tree or a flower in honor of your lost little one.
Do not expect that your partner will grieve the loss of your baby in the same way. Men and women grieve miscarriages in very different ways. Women look for support and express their feelings openly, while men hold their feelings about the miscarriage inside. Men also may feel as though they need to be “strong” and “brave” for their partner.
If you have older children, don’t be afraid to cry in front of them. They probably have already picked up on your sadness, and may need reassurance that they are not the cause of it. If it’s just too painful to let them see you cry, that’s okay, too. Ask a friend to entertain them while you tend to your needs for a bit.
Find any support groups for pregnancy loss in your area. Your doctor or midwife may be able to suggest local support groups for early pregnancy loss.
Write your feelings down. If it’s in a journal, in a word document, on your blog, or here on Band Back Together, it can help to put all of your feelings down in one place.
How Do I Help A Friend Going Through A Miscarriage?
Remind yourself that a loss is a loss, and everyone grieves their losses differently. Just because you didn’t (or don’t think you would) feel a certain way, everyone is entitled to their feelings – especially when it comes to a loss.
Validate and acknowledge your friend’s feelings. When a baby is lost, all of the dreams parents have for their child are lost too.
Be supportive if the family wants to have a funeral or memorial for their lost child.
If your friend has taken pictures of the baby, be sure to look at them, just as you would any other baby pictures. This, after all, is what your friend has left of his or her child.
Check in on your friend. Call, send a text, email, or visit them every few days. While they may not be able to immediately get back to you, knowing that you are thinking of them will mean an enormous amount to them.
If they’re up for it, take your friend out for a cup of coffee, a movie, anything to get them out of the house. The grief may make leaving the house alone a tremendous burden.
Allow your friend to grieve openly and honestly – we are noneof us alone.
Encourage your friend to take the time she needs to grieve – time off from work, from household chores, and other commitments that may be difficult to handle.
If you see your friend developing signs of postpartum depression, don’t hesitate to let her know what you see, in the most non-judgmental way possible. Hormones can be out of whack, even if the baby didn’t survive. This may be especially shocking when a woman miscarries her first child and doesn’t know if she will have postpartum depression.Read more about the signs, symptoms, and treatment of postpartum depression here.
Frequently ask your friend how she is doing and listen – really listen – to what she has to say. If there are gaps in the conversation, don’t prattle on, just sit and be near her.
There is no time limit on grief and grieving, so don’t expect your friend will “be better in two weeks,” or “two months.” A miscarriage can be a life-changing experience.
Remember that her needs are going to be ever-changing, as is the way it goes with all grief and grieving. Be flexible and remember that what she needs today may not be what she needs tomorrow.
Sometimes, all your friend may want is someone to be near her. If that means sitting quietly and holding her hand while you watch television together, so be it.
Arrange some kind of chore list with her family and friends so that she can have simple chores, like taking her older kids to school or cooking dinner, taken off her hands for a while.
Prepare meals for her and the family that are simply heat and eat. Those who are grieving often forget about eating or are too overwhelmed to think about cooking. Having something simple available will make it easier for her and the family to eat.
Hire someone (or do it yourself) to clean your friend’s house. It may be a chore to even get out of bed in the morning, let alone clean the kitchen.
A couple months after a miscarriage, most of the support will have dropped off, which increases feelings of loneliness and isolation. Make sure that you continue to support your friend.
Buy the family a Christmas ornament (or some keepsake) with the baby’s name on it (if they named the baby). They may never display the ornament, but it will be in a treasured place for them.
Remember to use the baby’s name (if the baby was named) when talking to the family. So many forget that the baby was here – that he or she did exist – and hearing that name will make the parents feel like the baby hasn’t entirely been forgotten.
Help the her return or send back any baby gifts received that she does not want to keep. This is entirely up to the mother’s discretion.
Offer to help pack up any reminders of the baby, if your friend wants them put away. It can be a huge burden for your friend to have to pack those items away.
What Should I NOT Say To My Friend Who Has Suffered A Miscarriage?
Many times, people who are grieving a miscarriage are comforted by those who love them. Unfortunately, certain types of comfort may not actually help the grieving mother.
Here are some things not to say to someone who has just suffered a miscarriage.
Do not say, “It was God’s will.” That sounds an awful lot like, “Your baby is supposed to be dead.” Those words sting more than you can imagine.
Do not say, “Better now than later.” It’s not comforting to anyone but the person who says it.
Do not say, “The baby must’ve had something wrong with it.” Even if it’s true, it’s a hurtful sentiment.
Do not compare grief. Yes, it was tragic that your pet hamster died, and nothing diminishes that, however, it is unhelpful for many people to hear that sort of thing when their loss is so fresh.
Do not say, “I know just how you feel…” and launch into the story of the death of someone you know and love. No two losses are the same. While you may have experienced complicated feelings when you lost someone you love, it is entirely unfair to make the person grieving a fresh loss comfort you.
Be wary of discussing your own miscarriage(s), or someone else you know that suffered miscarriages, especially if the stories end with, “…but went on to have a healthy pregnancy,” or “….and continued having miscarriages.” Some people find these stories comforting, while others will be insulted.
If the baby was lost in the second trimester or beyond, do not use the word “miscarriage,” unless the mother herself uses it.
Don’t offer to help unless you mean it.
Also, if you offer to help, offer to help with specific things.
Do not ask “do you need help?” or “What do you need from me?” because chances are, in the midst of grief, the mother will be unable to tell you what it is that she needs.
Don’t forget the dad. Even if he’s being stoic about the early pregnancy loss, he, too, is grieving. Remember that the mother and father both lost a baby.
If the family has older children, don’t forget about them. Even if they aren’t old enough to comprehend exactly what has happened, even the youngest toddlers know when their parents are sad. They may be confused and need reassurance that the sadness isn’t their fault. Offer to spend time with them – take them to a playground, play a board game, let them talk about how they are feeling.
This Is Not Supportive After a Miscarriage:
Giving advice.
Criticizing what you have heard.
Minimizing the miscarriage e.g. “That’s okay, you were only three months.”
Using cliches e.g. “It was God’s will” or “You’ve already had one healthy child.”
Talking about your own story of loss. Some identification may be helpful, but keep it to a minimum. This is not about you.
Not allowing the person to express emotions such as guilt, shame, and anger.
Taking over completely may cause potential feelings of helplessness and powerlessness.
Fixing it (you cannot take the grief away).
If you have more suggestions not listed here, please email bandbacktogether@gmail.com and we will add them to our list
Adoption is a process in which a person assumes parenting for another, and, while doing so, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents. Unlike guardianship, or other systems designed to care for the young, adoption is intended to be a permanent change in status that requires legal and/or religious sanction. Modern systems of adoption are often governed by many statutes and regulations.
Each year over 150,000 children are adopted in the United States. This number includes adoptions from foster care, relatives, private adoptions and international adoptions.
Children living in foster care are the largest population waiting to be adopted.
Of the 450,000 children in the system, over 125,000 are waiting for adoption. They’ll typically wait for over two years for a family to take them into their home. Many of these children will reach their 18th birthday without finding an adoptive family.
National Adoption Day and The Dave Thomas Foundation are committed to finding adoptive families for children, especially those who are in foster care. These organizations have wonderful communities for adoptive families, adoptees, and caregivers.
More than 15,000 of those adoptions each year are international adoptions, with most of those being from China, Ukraine, Russia, and Guatemala. Forty percent of the children adopted from other nations are under the age of one. China’s orphans are primarily girls while the other countries are equally dispersed.
How Do Adoptions Originate?
Adoptions may occur between family members or entirely unrelated individuals. Approximately half of the adoptions in the US are currently performed between related individuals, such as is the case with stepparent adoption, in which the new partner of a parent may legally adopt a child from a previous relationship. Intra-family adoption may also occur through child surrender, as the result of parental death, or when the child cannot otherwise be safely cared for.
Why Do People Adopt?
There are many reasons why people choose to adopt a child or children.
One of the primary reasons that people adopt a child is because they are infertile, or unable to carry a child of their own. It’s estimated that 11-24% of infertile Americans try to build a family through adoption.
There are a large number of reasons why people adopt, although not all are well documented. Some adopt children because they feel a conviction (religious or philosophical) to adopt, others want to begin a new family following divorce or death of one parent. Others adopt to avoid contributing to the perception of an over-crowded world or because they do not want to pass down genetic disorders like Tay-Sachs.
A recent study of women who choose to adopt suggest that these women are most likely to be between the ages of 40-44, married, have infertility issues, and are childless.
What Are The Types Of Adoptions?
Adoptions can occur between family members or unrelated individuals. Current data suggests that about half of the adoptions in the US are between related individuals. Unrelated adoptions can include the following types of adoption:
1) Private domestic adoptions – in a private domestic adoption, charities and for-profit organizations act as the middle man, bringing together prospective birth families and adoptive families. All parties must be of the same country. An alternative to a private domestic adoption occurs when the middle man is removed and birth families and adoptive families communicate directly, drafting contracts with a lawyer.
Private domestic adoptions account for a large percentage of all adoptions: in the US, almost 45% of all adoptions are estimated to have occurred via private adoption agencies and/or arrangements.
2) Foster Care Adoption: In this type of adoption, a child is initially placed in the foster care system, then placed for adoption. Children may enter the foster care system for a number of reasons, maltreatment and parental neglect are just a few of the reasons children end up in foster care. There are over 100,000 children in the US foster care system waiting to be adopted. Approximately 40% of all adoptions in the US are from the foster care system.
3) International Adoption: in international adoption, a child is placed up for adoption outside the child’s country of birth and can occur via public or private agencies. The laws in different countries vary in their willingness to allow international adoptions. Due to the amount of corruption and exploitation that occasionally accompanies international adoptions, there has been an effort to protect both the birth families and adoptive families from this abuse. In the US, less than 15% of adoptive families chose international adoption.
4) Embryo Adoption: the concept of embryo adoption is that remaining embryos from a couple’s IVF treatments are donated to another person or couple. These donated embryos are then placed inside the uterus of the adopted woman in order to facilitate pregnancy and childbirth. In the US, embryo adoption is governed by property law rather than the court systems.
5) Surrogacy: is an arrangement in which a woman carries and delivers a child for another couple or another person. The surrogate mother may be the child’s genetic mother (in the case of traditional surrogacy) or genetically unrelated to the child (in the case of gestational surrogacy).
What Are The Forms of Adoption?
Each type of adoption has its own set of requirements but in the end, the result is the same: a child being united with a family and a family is completed. Adoptions can take many forms: open adoptions, semi-open adoptions, and closed adoptions. These types of adoptions are discussed in further detail below:
Open Adoption:
Open adoption allows all information to be shared between the adoptive and biological parents. Open adoption can be a very informal arrangement that’s allowed to be terminated by the adoptive parents who have sole authority over the child. Other open adoptions are bound by a legally-enforceable, binding agreement which covers visitation rights, exchange of information, and other information about the adopted child.
Advantages for Open Adoption:
Those who experience an open adoption have their own unique experiences. These are some of the possible advantages of having an open adoption, including
Advantage of Open Adoption for Birth Parents:
Feeling of control – the process in which a birth family can review, interview, and choose parents for your child can provide birth parents with a feeling of empowerment, control, and security.
Lessened fear – when regular communication occurs between the adoptive family and the birth family, any concerns about the child’s well-being can be placed to rest.
Relationship with the child – as an open adoption allows for more frequent interactions, there is a possibility of the development of a relationship with the child.
Relationship with the adoptive family – because of the open lines of communication, there is an opportunity to develop a positive relationship between the adoptive and birth families.
Lessened mourning – being able to speak with the child and his or her adoptive family helps the birth family to deal with the loss and grief of an adoption.
Lessened uncertainty – most birth families feel comforted and reassured about their child’s well-being through regular interactions with the child’s adoptive family.
Lessened guilt – since the lines of communication remain open and the relationship between families open, there’s less of a struggle with grief for birth parents.
Advantage of Open Adoption For Adoptive Parents:
Reduction of fear – because there is on-going communication between the birth-family and the adoptive family, any concerns about the intentions of the birthmother can be eliminated.
Relationship with the birth family – there’s an opportunity for the birth family and adoptive family to develop a healthy, positive relationship.
Medical information – an open adoption allows for increased opportunities for more medical information if the need arises.
Affirmation – an adoptive family may feel encouraged knowing that they were chosen specifically by the birth family.
Understanding – an open adoption allows the child to understand more about his or her history so that the child can answer questions like, “who am I?” and “where did I come from?
Advantages of Open Adoption For Adopted Child:
Understanding identity – open adoption does allow the adopted child to learn his or her family history, which can make it easier for adopted children to understand who, exactly, they are.
No sense of abandonment – because the child can openly communicate with the birth family, the feelings of abandonment experienced by the child may be lessened.
Medical information – as the child ages, he or she may need a more detailed medical history.
Relationships – open adoption offers the adoptive child the potential of developing a relationship with his or her birth mother and extended family.
Support network – as most birth families continue to be concerned about their adoptive child, the birth family can act as advocates and a support system for the child.
Disadvantages to Open Adoptions:
Open adoption occurs when potential birth parents and prospective adoptive families are able to have personal interaction. All identities are shared, and interaction may include emails, letters, telephone calls, and/or visits. Like all other forms of adoption, there are disadvantages to open adoption.
Disadvantages of Open Adoption For Birth Parents:
Potential for disappointment – if the adoptive family fails to meet expectations when meeting with the birth family, this can lead to crushing disappointments.
Feeling obligated – once an adoptive family has been financially involved or emotionally invested with a birth family, a birthmother may feel as though she must adopt her child to this family.
Abused trust – the relationship with the adoptive family does allow the potential for abuse of trust, such as manipulation of situations.
Changing minds – an adoptive family can choose to stop or terminate the adoption process at any time, which can lead to the child being placed in limbo, possibly foster care, until alternate arrangements have been made.
Disadvantages of Open Adoption for Adoptive Family
Unstable relationships – an adoptive family may learn that their relationship with the birth family includes an unhealthy or emotionally unstable birth family member.
Added support – an adoptive family may feel the pressure to be an emotional support system for the birth family.
Added pressure – the birth family may want a greater amount of openness than the adoptive parents do, which may lead to the adoptive family to accept the demands of the birth family because they fear if they do not, they will not receive the baby.
Disadvantages of an Open Adoption for the Adopted Child:
Feelings of rejection – if contact between the birth family and the adoptive family ceases, the child may feel intense rejection.
Confusion – as the child grows, he or she may struggle with issues of identity from trying to make sense of the family history of two separate families.
Social Anxiety – an adoptive child who has ongoing communication with his or her birth family may have trouble explaining the family dynamics to his or her peers.
Power Plays – the adoptive child may attempt manipulation between the adoptive and birth families by playing them against one another.
Reduction in ability to assimilate into the adoptive family – increased interaction with birth family may lead to challenges for the child in assimilating into the adoptive family.
Semi-Open Adoption:
A semi-open adoption is a process by which a potential birth mother (or birth families) exchange non-identifying information with the adopting family.
Generally speaking, semi-open adoptions are facilitated through a third party – an adoption agency or adoption attorney. The identity of all parties is typically kept confidential, the interaction between families is generally with emails and letters. Sometimes, emails or visits are arranged in a semi-open adoption.
Advantages of a Semi-Open Adoption:
Experiences with semi-open adoptions vary wildly and from person to person. However, some of the common advantages of a semi-open adoption are broken down below:
Advantages of Semi-Open Adoption for Birth Parents:
Sense of privacy as all communication and interaction between birth parents and adoptive families are facilitated by a third party.
Feeling in Control – birth parents can feel more in control as they have the chance to review, interview and select the adoptive parents for their child.
Fewer Uncertainties – the interactions and updates given by the adoption agency can comfort birthmothers by reassuring them that the child is well cared for.
Less Guilt – getting updates and letters from the adoptive family can help birthmothers feel less guilt for placing their child up for adoption.
Lessened Mourning – placing a child up for adoption is a loss and must be grieved. Having regular updates about the child via letters and visits can help with the sense of loss experienced.
Less Fear – with on-going communications between the birth family and adoptive family, birth parents often feel more secure about the well-being of the child.
Advantages of Semi-Open Adoption for Adoptive Parents:
Medically informed – while a medical history of the birth parents is a normal part of the adoption process, a semi-open adoption allows for access to additional medical needs, if circumstances require it.
Feeling Encouraged – Because the birthmother hand-picked the adoptive family, the adoptive family can feel reaffirmed and empowered.
Less fear – when the intentions of the birthmother and her family are openly communicated to the adoptive parents, it helps to reduce the concerns and fears regarding the intentions of the birthmother.
Clear Roles – having a semi-open adoption allows the roles of each party to be better managed and more clearly defined.
Increased Confidence – While there is less communication between the birth family and the adoptive family, the adoptive family is still able to ask questions and address concerns about the child’s history.
Advantages of Semi-Open Adoption for The Adopted Child:
Understanding self – in a semi-open adoption, adopted children who have access to their birth families allows them to gather more information about family history and help answer questions such as “who am I?” and “where did I come from?”
No search required – there is no issue of the child needing to seek out his or her birth parents.
Not Feeling Abandoned – because the child has access to his or her birth family, the child may feel less a sense of abandonment.
Medical Information – while medical information is a standard part of an adoption, a semi-open adoption allows for the child to ask medical questions of the birth family throughout their life.
Closed Adoption:
A closed adoption is an adoption process in which there is no interaction between the birthmother and the prospective families. Once a standard procedure for adoption, all identifying information is sealed, preventing disclosure of the adoptive parents, biological kin, and adoptees identities. However, closed adoption does allow for the transmission of non-identifying information, like medical history, religious and/or ethnic background.
Advantages of A Closed Adoption:
Like any other form of adoption, the experiences of a closed adoption may vary wildly. Some of the advantages of a closed adoption may include:
Advantages of Closed Adoption For Birth Parents:
Closure – some birth families report that a closed adoption allowed them the sense of closure to move on with their lives.
Privacy – people who feel threatened or vulnerable by their decision to place a child up for adoption may benefit greatly from having a closed adoption.
Reduction of fear – birthmothers who have concerns about explaining their decisions to others may find that a closed adoption offers them a way to avoid that conversation.
Advantages of Closed Adoption for Adoptive Parents:
Absence of boundaries – because the birth family has nothing to do with the adopted child, there’s no risk for complications that may arise from interference by the birth parent or co-parenting concerns.
Freedom – when the birth family is not involved with the child after the adoption, the adoptive parents are free to enjoy their family without the potential threat from outside intrusion.
Advantages of Closed Adoption For Adopted Children:
Protection – closed adoption affords a layer of protection for adopted children who may have unstable or emotionally disturbed birth family members.
Absence of boundaries – the adopted child is always sure who calls the shots, makes the rules, and abides by them, as there is no meddling or concerns from the birth family.
Disadvantages To A Closed Adoption:
Closed adoption occurs when there is no contact or interaction between birth families and prospective adoptive families. No identifying information shall be revealed, though non-identifying information, such as medical records, will be made available to all parties. There are a number of disadvantages to closed adoptions.
These disadvantages to closed adoptions are discussed in further detail below:
Disadvantages of Closed Adoption for Birth Parents:
Delayed grieving – the grieving process of adopting a child can be complicated, as there is no information to be given about the child’s progress.
Denial – placing a child in an adoptive family through closed adoption can lead to feelings of denial that the child was ever born and placed for adoption.
Guilt – a closed adoption does not allow the birth family to explain the reasons that the child was placed for adoption, which can lead to feelings of extreme guilt.
Lack of information – lack of information about the child can compound feelings of guilt and denial, leaving many birth families struggling with depression.
Abandonment – many birthmothers report feeling as though they are abandoning their child, and the inability to communicate with her child can only heighten these feelings.
Disadvantages of Closed Adoption For Adoptive Parents:
Denial – a closed adoption can increase feelings of denial about having an “adopted child,” or “fertility status.”
Fear – adoptive families fear that the birthmother will return and demand the child back. This fear is a consequence of limited information about the birth family.
Control – there is less personal control for the adoptive family who must rely upon the adoption agency to act as a go-between.
Medical history – while most children who are adopted have a medical history, if medical issues arise later in life, it may be impossible to get more information about medical issues from the birth family.
Disadvantages for a Closed Adoption For The Adopted Child:
Confusion – as the adopted child ages, he or she may struggle with personal identity as he or she has no contact with his or her birth family.
Information – children involved in a closed adoption have limited information about their birth families and history. This lack of information can lead a void in an adopted child who has many unanswered questions about his or her heritage.
Preoccupation – a child in a closed adoption may be preoccupied with his or her adoption than other children.
How Do I Begin An Adoption?
Deciding to pursue an adoption can feel overwhelming and scary; the process is long and involved. Here are some steps you’ll need to go through to begin an adoption:
1) Teach yourself and your family members about adoption, learn all that you can about the types of adoptions, the restrictions these adoptions require, and the approximate cost for each type of adoption. It may help to have a binder and notebook to write yourself notes and reminders.
2) Decide what type of adoption you want to pursue: domestic, international, foster care adoptions, and make a list of the adoption agencies that you’re interested in. Read reviews of the agencies, ask for references from friends, family, and coworkers, to find out which adoption agencies are legitimate and which are not.
3) Investigate ways to handle adoption expenses, which are substantial. These costs can include adoption agency feeds, legal fees, birthmother expenses, as well as home study expenses. The following are potential avenues to explore to off-set the costs of adoption:
Employee Benefits – many employers offer adoption reimbursement, check with your Human Resources department to see if your company offers adoption reimbursement.
Federal Tax Credit for adoption. Call 1-800-829-3676 and request information on the Adoption Tax Credit and Tax Exclusion from publication 968.
State tax credit – contact an adoption specialist in your state to ascertain whether or not your state offers a tax credit for a child adopted from a public adoption agency.
Military Benefits – many times, the US military will reimburse up to $2,000 per child for adoption costs.
Dependency exemption – while not adoption-specific, adoptive parents do qualify for taking a dependency exemption on their income taxes, even if the adoption hasn’t been finalized.
Adoption Loans – some banks, life insurance policies, and credit unions offer adoption loans.
Private Grants – these grants are for families who are socioeconomically challenged or to encourage the adoption of special needs children. Call the National Adoption Foundation at (203) 791-3811 for more information
4) Once your research has been carefully completed, select an adoption agency or adoption facilitator and/or attorney. You’ll begin orientation with the adoption agency to discuss the adoption process. It’s recommended that you attend several orientations for different adoption agencies so that you get the sense of which agency is right for you.
5) Be ready to fill out oodles of paperwork, including an agency application form, along with various other forms that will be necessary for the adoption process to begin.
6) Once the adoption agency has reviewed and accepted your completed adoption application, you will undergo a home study. A home study is performed to evaluate the home environment and help the adoptive parents prepare for the arrival of their adopted child. The home study will include a visit from a social worker, educational classes with other adoptive families, a physical examination, fingerprints taken, and a background check performed. Average time for a completed home study is 2 months.
7) Begin to wait to be matched with a child. The waiting period depends upon a number of factors: it can take longer to adopt a Caucasian newborn (up to 5 years). Adopting another race may reduce the waiting period significantly. International adoptions may take longer than a year depending upon the requirements of the country.
8) Once you’ve been matched with a child and have decided to adopt this child, it’s time to file a petition to adopt.
9) After the birth parents have terminated their parental rights, and the child has been in the home for over six months, a social worker will submit a recommendation for approval. Then, a judge will finalize the adoption by awarding the adoptive parents the legal rights and responsibilities for their children. This final step will vary if an international adoption has taken place, as there are additional legal steps involved.
What Is Adoption Disruption?
Adoption disruption is a term that’s used when adoption is ended. Technically disruption occurs when the adoption has been abandoned by the adopting family before the adoption has been legally completed. In practice, however, adoption disruption can occur anytime an adoption is ended. Generally, the disruption of adoption requires a court petition.
Adoption disruption can occur for any number of reasons: psychological or emotional issues of the adopted child, unrealistic expectations of parenthood, or family issues among the adoptive families.
What Are Some Of The Challenges Of Adoption?
The process of adoption can be fraught with emotional upheaval and mountains of paperwork.
An adoption may be interrupted when there are changes in the law, expiration of paperwork in the case of a lengthy adoption process, or other unforeseen circumstances. It is very beneficial for those going through the adoption process to seek social and emotional support for this reason.
Many families experience post-adoption challenges, as well. It is normal for adoptive parents and children to take time to bond and develop a family routine – this process can take longer for older children as they will be simultaneously dealing with loss from a previous living situation.
The decision of whether and how to discuss the adoption with family, friends, and the child can require much deliberation as well, especially as some families may experience insensitive comments from time to time.
Both birth parents and adoptive parents can experience depression after an adoption. In the case of a birthmother who has recently given birth, hormones coupled with the loss can trigger postpartum depression; the birth parents may have also developed an attachment to the child prior to the adoption and will grieve the loss of a child placed with an adoptive family.
Adoptive parents can find it difficult to cope with the sudden change in parenting status after an emotional adoption process and may suffer from Post-Adoption Depression Syndrome (PADS).
A miscarriage is the spontaneous loss of a pregnancy before 20 weeks gestation. The majority of miscarriages occur within the first 13 weeks of pregnancy. Miscarriage is the most common form of pregnancy loss with as many as 15-25% of all clinically recognized pregnancies ending in miscarriage. After 20 weeks, a fetus is technically viable outside the womb; a pregnancy loss at this point is considered a stillbirth.
Contrary to popular belief, sex and exercise will not cause a miscarriage.
If you have suffered a miscarriage, YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME. Please remember that.
Symptoms Of Miscarriage:
If any of the following symptoms occur during pregnancy, it is important to call your doctor as soon as possible. Possible symptoms of miscarriage may include:
Lower back pain, or abdominal pain that is dull, sharp, or cramping.
Tissue or clots passing through the vagina.
Brown or bright red vaginal bleeding (with or without cramps)
A sudden decrease in signs of pregnancy.
White-to-pink mucus from the vagina.
Types Of Miscarriage:
Threatened Miscarriage – any vaginal bleeding during early pregnancy without cervical dilation or changes in cervical consistency. Mild cramping may occur; however, usually, no pain exists. No tissue or fetal membranes have passed through the vagina. Threatened miscarriages are very common – about 25-30% of pregnancies have some amount of bleeding; less than half of all threatened miscarriages lead to a true miscarriage.
Inevitable Miscarriage – an early pregnancy that has vaginal bleeding and dilation of the cervix. Generally speaking, the vaginal bleeding is heavier than with a threatened miscarriage and the pain is greater.
Incomplete Miscarriage – a pregnancy that has vaginal bleeding, dilation of the cervix and passage of the fetus and other products of conception. Often the cramps are extremely painful and the bleeding from the vagina is heavy. While a complete miscarriage may not have occurred, the miscarriage is inevitable.
Complete Miscarriage – a full miscarriage; all products of conception have been passed through the vagina, and the mother notes that the amount of bleeding and pain have diminished. The cervix is closed and high. Ultrasound examination reveals an empty uterus.
Missed Miscarriage – the presence of a nonviable intrauterine pregnancy that remains in the uterus without bleeding, abdominal pain, passage of tissue or cervical changes. A missed miscarriage is generally diagnosed by the absence of fetal heart tones or by an ultrasound.
Chemical Pregnancy – a pregnancy lost shortly after implantation. May occur so close to normal menstruation that many women do not realize they are pregnant.
Molar Pregnancy – a genetic error during fertilization leads to growth and proliferation of abnormal tissue within the uterus. Molar pregnancies don’t usually contain an embryo, but will often have more severe pregnancy symptoms. A molar pregnancy is diagnosed via ultrasound.
Blighted Ovum (also called anembryonic pregnancy)- a fertilized egg implants into the uterine wall, but fetal development does not occur. Often ultrasonography will reveal a gestational sac (with or without a yolk sac) without fetal growth.
Chances Of Having A Miscarriage:
Most women of childbearing age have between 10-25% chance of having a miscarriage.
Women under 35 = 15% chance of miscarriage.
Women between 35-45 = 20-35% chance of miscarriage.
Women over 45 = up to 50% chance of miscarriage.
Why Do Miscarriages Occur?
Typically, the cause for miscarriages is idiopathic, meaning that no cause can be easily identified. In the first trimester of pregnancy, chromosomal abnormalities of the embryo are the most common cause of miscarriage.
Other causes of miscarriages include:
Hormone imbalances
Improper implantation of the fertilized ova into the lining of the uterus
Maternal infections such as the German measles, CMV (cytomegalovirus), mycoplasma pneumonia, etc.
Structural abnormalities of the uterus including fibroids, endometriosis, abnormal growth of the placenta, and poor muscle tone in the mouth of the uterus
Drinking, smoking or recreational drug use (especially cocaine)
Advanced maternal age
Trauma to the mother
Treatment For Miscarriages:
The number one goal of medical professionals is to prevent and/or treat complications of the mother while allowing the body to do what it needs to do. Common complications include loss of blood (hemorrhage) and infection. If the body passes all of the fetal tissue, generally no medical intervention is necessary, although medications may be given to prevent excessive blood loss or assist the body during the process.
If the body does not manage to pass the fetal tissue properly, medical intervention may be required. The medical procedure practitioners use when fetal tissue is improperly passed is called a D&C, which stands for “dilation and curettage.” This is a relatively minor surgery during which a doctor enlarges the cervix (dilation) and removes (curettage) any residual fetal tissue from the uterus. A D&C is generally performed in an outpatient surgery center or hospital and under sedation. A D&C is also performed for other medical issues besides miscarriages, such as to remove uterine fibroids or polyps, to control irregular menstrual bleeding, and to rule out endometrial cancer.
Bleeding and pain should be monitored. Any changes or signs of infection (chills, nausea, vomiting, and fever) should be reported to the doctor immediately.
A miscarriage should always be reported to the doctor so that potential complications can be ruled out.
Following a miscarriage, do not use a douche, have sex, or insert anything into your vagina until your doctor says it is okay. The waiting period is typically about 6 weeks.
Prevention Of Miscarriages:
Unfortunately most miscarriages occur for reasons we can’t identify, which makes prevention and prediction of miscarriage very difficult; however, there are things that can be done to give any pregnancy the very best chance:
Get adequate prenatal care.
Follow the advice of your doctor or midwife.
Take steps to control high blood pressure (called “preeclampsia” in pregnancy).
Avoid alcohol, nicotine, and recreational drugs.
Discuss all prescription drugs with your doctor or midwife.
Avoid or cut down on caffeine intake.
Emotions Following A Miscarriage
Emotional responses of individuals who have experienced a miscarriage vary. Many grieve the loss of pregnancy just as they would grieve the death of a living person, which means that they may experience shock and denial followed by feelings of guilt, depression, and anger before finally feeling acceptance. If you have experienced a miscarriage, give yourself time to grieve your loss. Seek support from friends, family, bereavement groups, and/or a therapist to aid you in healing emotionally.
It is important to note that men and women may react differently to the loss of a pregnancy, which can further complicate a relationship. Men do not consider themselves to be a father until they hold their baby for the first time; because of this, it is not uncommon for a man to feel confused about how to react to pregnancy loss or to experience the loss to a lesser degree than a woman.
In addition, men tend to grieve more privately, and their grief may be funneled into projects or the examination of facts and information surrounding the pregnancy. Women, on the other hand, feel a connection to the pregnancy earlier and tend to be more outwardly emotive regarding the loss. No matter how your partner reacts, it’s important to stay communicative and be respectful of their feelings and any differences in how they grieve.
Women who have suffered miscarriage are susceptible to postpartum depression. It can be difficult to differentiate between grief and depression, but typically if the symptoms are severe and impinge upon one’s ability to function for a prolonged period of time, professional help should be sought.
How To Help A Loved One Who Has Miscarried:
As with any loss, a miscarriage can be hard for friends and family to navigate. Knowing what to do or say can be hard. Here are some tips:
Take cues from your loved one: because everyone grieves differently, try to take your lead from her to determine how she’s taking the loss and what she needs.
Listen: she may want to talk about thoughts and emotions, or she may need to talk about the pregnancy and baby. Listen carefully, focusing on what she’s saying (not on what you’re going to say) and showing you’re paying attention by making eye contact, nodding, gestures, etc.
Choose your words carefully: don’t tell her she can try again or that it was “meant to be” – these cliches, while common, aren’t always comforting. Don’t criticize or offer advice; listen to how she talks about the miscarriage and go from there.
Be genuine: don’t tell her you know how it feels or what she’s going through unless you actually do – even though you mean well, this can come off as very offensive. As well, it’s okay to be honest and say, “I don’t know what to say. I’m so sorry for your loss.”
Consider sending a card: this can be a good way to reach out and let a loved one know you’re thinking about her and sorry for her loss.
Don’t be afraid to check in: continue asking her how she’s doing and give her the opportunity to talk about her thoughts and feelings. As well, don’t leave out Dad: he’s grieving, too, so make sure to ask how he is doing.
Grief Issues Special to Miscarriage – Miscarriage Support Auckland, Inc. is based in New Zealand and provides information about miscarriage issues.
Share – This organization provides mutual support for bereaved parents and families who have suffered a loss due to miscarriage, stillbirth, or neonatal death. SHARE provides newsletters, pen pals, and information regarding professionals, caregivers, and pastoral care.
HopeXchange – Information, support, and hope after pregnancy loss.
Unspoken Grief – A site dedicated to being open, honest and raw about healing after miscarriage, stillbirth or early infant loss.
Still Standing Magazine – an online magazine focusing on encouraging women, men, and even children to embrace life, connecting hearts around the world who have similar life experiences and becoming a resource for friends, family, and even medical professionals, to know how to support someone enduring child loss and/or infertility.
Still Birthday – Wonderful resource page full of love, support, and information about all things related to miscarriage and baby loss. In addition to information about the loss, there is information about how to care for yourself during this incredibly difficult time. It also contains information about how to start the process again after a loss
While we here at Band Back Together work tirelessly to collect hotline numbers, it’s not always possible for us to vet each number. If a hotline number is no longer functional or is in bad taste, please send an email to becky@bandbacktogether.com with the phone number so we can remove it.
A safe space to talk about abortion experiences by offering a talkline providing unbiased support and encouragement of self-care for people who have had an abortion.
ARC offers non-directive information and support to parents before, during and after antenatal screening; when they are told their baby has an anomaly; when they are making difficult decisions about continuing with or ending a pregnancy, and when they are coping with complex and painful issues after making a decision, including bereavement.
Call our national helpline and speak to a member of our trained team. Our helpline is open Monday to Friday, 10.00am-5.30pm.
Call 0845 077 2290 or 0207 713 7486 from a mobile.
To speak to an information support specialist, please contact us at 1.800.394.3366 between 9:30 a.m. and 5:30 p.m. (ET)
For questions regarding our services, website, or website content, contact info@childwelfare.gov
Use Live Chat(opens in new window), an instant messaging service, to contact an information support specialist between 10 a.m. and 5 p.m. (ET). We recommend turning off your pop-up blocker to maximize this service.
NCADD focuses on increasing public awareness and understanding of the diseases of alcohol and drug dependence through education, prevention, information and referral, intervention, treatment services, advocacy, and recovery support services.
Confidential, free, 24-hour-a-day, 365-day-a-year, information service, in English and Spanish, for individuals and family members facing mental and/or substance use disorders.
NCADD focuses on increasing public awareness and understanding of the diseases of alcohol and drug dependence through education, prevention, information and referral, intervention, treatment services, advocacy, and recovery support services.
Confidential, free, 24-hour-a-day, 365-day-a-year, information service, in English and Spanish, for individuals and family members facing mental and/or substance use disorders.
Offers confidential support and information to people living with Alzheimer’s or other dementia, caregivers, families, and the public.
We are available around the clock, 365 days a year at 800.272.3900 (TTY: 866.403.3073).
Click the “Live Chat” green button on this page to connect with a member of our Helpline staff. Live chat is typically available from 7a.m.-7p.m. (CST) Monday through Friday.
Online.Use this form to let us know how we can help you. We will respond to you within 24 hours.
Offers information on diagnosis, treatment, patient care, caregiver needs, long-term care, and research and clinical trials related to Alzheimer’s disease.
An independent, national 501 (c)(3) organization dedicated to helping federally and commercially insured people living with life-threatening, chronic and rare diseases with the out-of-pocket costs for their prescribed medications.
Is a non-profit organization that funds research into cures for Alzheimer’s disease, macular degeneration and glaucoma, and provides the public with information about risk factors, preventative lifestyles, available treatments and coping strategies.
Hotline: 1 (800) 799 – 7233 Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week via phone and online chat.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline (The Hotline) is available for anyone experiencing domestic violence, seeking resources or information, or questioning unhealthy aspects of their relationship.
The IRS Employee Plans maintains the Abusive Transaction Hotline that people can use to share information (anonymously, if preferred) about abusive tax shelters and emerging issues that may be abusive in retirement plans.
An independent, national 501 (c)(3) organization dedicated to helping federally and commercially insured people living with life-threatening, chronic and rare diseases with the out-of-pocket costs for their prescribed medications.
We lead the fight for the arthritis community through life-changing information and resources, access to optimal care, advancements in science and community connections.
The Arthritis National Research Foundation provides arthritis research grants to scientists at major universities and research institutes across America.
Contact the Arthritis National Research Foundation office through this form or by dialing (800) 588-2873 or (562) 437-6808
National Institute of Arthritis and Musculoskeletal and Skin Diseases Information Clearinghouse
The mission of the National Institute of Arthritis and Musculoskeletal and Skin Diseases is to support research into the causes, treatment, and prevention of arthritis and musculoskeletal and skin diseases; the training of basic and clinical scientists to carry out this research; and the dissemination of information on research progress in these diseases.
HelpLine is a FREE call-back or email service available to all Canadians. Whether you have asthma and other respiratory allergies or are a caregiver, our team of expert CREs can support you.Asthma Canada
The American Autoimmune Related Diseases Association is dedicated to the eradication of autoimmune diseases and the alleviation of suffering and the socioeconomic impact of autoimmunity through fostering and facilitating collaboration in the areas of education, public awareness, research, and patient services in an effective, ethical and efficient manner.
NORD works with pharmaceutical companies to ensure that vital medications are available to those in need. They currently offer a program to assist with premiums and co-pays for PNH patients.
Patients can contact NORD’s Patient Services Representatives at 1-800-999-6673
Si deseas hablar con alguien en espanol por favor llame al (844) 259-7178 para asistencia.
An independent, national 501 (c)(3) organization dedicated to helping federally and commercially insured people living with life-threatening, chronic and rare diseases with the out-of-pocket costs for their prescribed medications.
The Child Death Helpline is a helpline for anyone affected by the death of a child of any age, from pre-birth to adult, under any circumstances, however recently or long ago.
Email: contact@childdeathhelpline.org
Freephone: 0800 282 986
Additional Freephone number for ALL mobiles: 0808 800 6019
Can guide you through the grieving process and empower you to help other families facing the same tragedy.
For Immediate Grief Support, Call 1-800-221-7437.
Counselors are available 24/7
Guiding Light – Stillbirth – Red Nose Grief and Grieving – Australia
Welcome to Red Nose Grief and Loss (formerly SIDS and Kids). With over 40 years’ experience supporting grieving individuals and families, we understand the sudden or unexpected death of a baby or young child is one of the most difficult experiences any person will face
Saying Goodbye provides comprehensive information, advice, support and much more to anyone who has suffered the loss of a baby, at any stage of pregnancy, at birth or in infancy, whether the loss be recent or historic.
Specializes in providing beautiful small baby caskets and burial products for families suffering the loss of a child through miscarriage, stillbirth, or preemie death.
Comfort Zone Camp is a nonprofit 501(c)3 bereavement organization that transforms the lives of children who have experienced the death of a parent, sibling, or primary caregiver.
Our programs are free of charge and include confidence building activities and age-based support groups that break the emotional isolation grief often bring
SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) and SUDC (Sudden Unexplained Death of a Child)
The Lullaby Trust (formerly FSID the Foundation for the Study of Infant Death) (UK)
Lullaby funds research, supports bereaved families and promotes safe baby care advice, including helpline for bereaved parents and their families, friends, neighbours and anyone else who has experienced the sudden death of a baby.
1st Breath works with parents who are experiencing the stillbirth of their baby from the time they learn the baby has died throughout their grief journey
One very important resource is having support and guidance as you prepare for your baby’s birth. Contact Loss Doulas International to make birth planning and companioning available to families in need when their child is to be born still, miscarried, or has a condition that is incompatible with life and likely will not live long after birth.
Sands provide support for bereaved parents and their families when their baby dies, before, during or soon after birth as well as information and support for healthcare professionals.
International Society for the Study and Prevention of Perinatal and Infant Death
The International Society for the Study and Prevention of Perinatal and Infant Death (ISPID) is a not-for-profit organization that is leading the world in discovering evidence-based preventive measures for stillbirth and sudden infant death.
ISPID also works to promote improved quality, standardization of care for bereaved parents, and networking families, professionals, and scientists through resource sharing
Guiding Light – Stillbirth – Red Nose Grief and Grieving – Australia
Welcome to Red Nose Grief and Loss (formerly SIDS and Kids). With over 40 years’ experience supporting grieving individuals and families, we understand the sudden or unexpected death of a baby or young child is one of the most difficult experiences any person will face
The Ectopic Pregnancy Foundation has been established with the aim of improving the care of women with a diagnosis, or possible diagnosis, of ectopic pregnancy. We hope to reduce the morbidity and maternal mortality caused by this common condition.
ARC offers non-directive information and support to parents before, during and after antenatal screening; when they are told their baby has an anomaly; when they are making difficult decisions about continuing with or ending a pregnancy, and when they are coping with complex and painful issues after making a decision, including bereavement.
Call our national helpline and speak to a member of our trained team. Our helpline is open Monday to Friday, 10.00am-5.30pm.
Call 0845 077 2290 or 0207 713 7486 from a mobile.
Miscarriage Hotlines:
This UK-based hotline provides information and support for people affected by miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy or molar pregnancy.
They also provide a helpline: 01924 200 799.
The helpline is available Monday through Friday 9AM to 4PM UK Time (5 hours ahead of EST).
SUDC Program Hotline for helping navigate the autopsy and scene investigation: 1-800-620-SUDC.
helps to cover the myriad costs associated with transplants, such as donor searches, compatibility testing, bone marrow harvesting, medications, home and child care services, medical equipment, transportation, cord blood banking, housing, and other expenses
Open Homes Medical Stays – a partnership with Airbnb’s Open Homes Medical Stays program provides free temporary accommodations to patients diagnosed with any form of cancer or undergoing a hematopoietic stem cell transplant, as well as housing for their caregivers, family members, and donors.
Scholarship Grants offers survivors support towards an academic future so their hopes and dreams remain intact. Scholarship Grants supports students of all ages as they pursue their educational goals.
Helping clients and families how to bring together a network of relatives, friends, and neighbors in fundraising efforts to help cover the costs of uncovered medical expenses
Case Management Professional case managers at PAF work with the mission to identify and reduce the challenges that individuals like yourself are having when seeking care for their disease.
Co-Pay Relief Program patient assistance is purely donor-funded and money is dispersed to qualified patients while funds are available for each of the Diseases identified.
Largest of several US federal programs that provide assistance to people with disabilities.
(800) 772-1213
CancerCare
CancerCare® Co-Payment Assistance Foundation (CCAF) is a nonprofit organization dedicated to helping patients afford their co-payments for chemotherapy and targeted treatment drugs.
Good Days is a non-profit advocacy organization that provides resources for life-saving and life-extending treatments to people in need of access to care.
The HealthWell Foundation provides financial assistance to eligible individuals to cover coinsurance, copayments, health care premiums and deductibles for certain medications and therapies. They have a pediatric assistance fund regardless of disease.
The Julia’s Wings Foundation (JWF) is a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization with the mission of providing assistance to families of children with the life threatening hematological diseases; aplastic anemia, MDS and PNH.
NORD works with pharmaceutical companies to ensure that vital medications are available to those in need. They currently offer a program to assist with premiums and co-pays for PNH patients.
Patients can contact NORD’s Patient Services Representatives at 1-800-999-6673
Si deseas hablar con alguien en espanol por favor llame al (844) 259-7178 para asistencia.
An independent, national 501 (c)(3) organization dedicated to helping federally and commercially insured people living with life-threatening, chronic and rare diseases with the out-of-pocket costs for their prescribed medications.
Dedicated to the prevention of child abuse. Serving the U.S. and Canada, the hotline is staffed 24 hours a day, 7 days a week with professional crisis counselors who—through interpreters—provide assistance in over 170 languages. The hotline offers crisis intervention, information, and referrals to thousands of emergency, social service, and support resources. All calls are confidential.
Hotline: 1 (800) 422 – 4453
Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week via phone and text.
A program of Boystown USA and is available to children, parents, and families who are struggling with self-harm, mental health disorders, and abuse.
Hotline: 1 (800) 448 – 3000
Text: Text VOICE to 20121 (hours vary)
Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week via phone, email, text, and online chat.
The Childhelp National Child Abuse HotlineChildren In Immediate Risk or Danger 1-800-THE-LOSTChild Abuse National Hotline: 1-800-252-2873 (1-800-25ABUSE)
Parenting Support: 1-800-CHILDREN
First Steps (East Valley Child Crisis Center) for child abuse prevention: 1-480-969-2308.
Helpline for Children – Toll-Free in BC (no area code needed) 310.1234
Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-342-3720
Family Violence Prevention Fund: 1-415-252-8900
Day Care Complaint Line: 1-800-732-5207
CyberTipline for reporting the exploitation of children: 1-800-843-5678
Friends of Battered Women and Their Children: 1-800-603-HELP
Kid Help – Children and adolescents in crisis: 1-800-543-7283
Children of Alcoholics:
National Association for Children of Alcoholics: 1-888-55-4COAS (1-888-554-2627)Al-Anon/Alateen Hotline: 1-800-344-2666
Suicide & Depression Hotline – Covenant House 800-999-9999
Disaster Distress:
SAMHSA Disaster Distress Helpline (USA) is a national hotline dedicated to providing immediate crisis counseling for people who are experiencing emotional distress related to any natural or human-caused disaster.
Open 24/7, 365-day-a–year
Call 1-800-985-5990 or text TalkWithUs to 66746
Provides counseling in 100 other languages via 3rd-party interpretation services
Disabilities Hotlines:
The Americans With Disabilities Act Information and Assistance Hotline: 1-800-514-0301
TTY: 1-800-514-0383
International: 1-202-541-0301
Domestic Or Intimate Partner Violence Abuse Hotlines:
Hotline: 1 (800) 799 – 7233 Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week via phone and online chat.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline (The Hotline) is available for anyone experiencing domestic violence, seeking resources or information, or questioning unhealthy aspects of their relationship.
If you have questions, are aware of suspicious activities, or believe you have experienced commodity futures trading, commodity options trading or foreign currency trading (forex) fraud, please let the CFTC know immediately.
IRS Employee Plans maintains the Abusive Transaction Hotline that people can use to share information (anonymously, if preferred) about abusive tax shelters and emerging issues that may be abusive in retirement plans.
The LGBT National Help Center serves gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, and questioning people by providing free and confidential peer support and local resources.
The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 25.
We are a group of volunteers with comprehensive sex education providing accurate, non-judgmental, confidential information about sexuality, gender, and relationships.
The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 25.
Good Days is a non-profit advocacy organization that provides resources for life-saving and life-extending treatments to people in need of access to care.
An independent, national 501 (c)(3) organization dedicated to helping federally and commercially insured people living with life-threatening, chronic and rare diseases with the out-of-pocket costs for their prescribed medications.
GMHC AIDS Hotline: 1-800-AIDS-NYC (1-800-243-7692) TTY: 1-212-645-7470
General AIDS hotline for those worried that they may be infected, or people trying to access New York City AIDS resource: 1-212-807-6655
CDC Business and Labor Resource Service (HIV at Work): 1-877-242-9760 TTY: 1-800-243-7012
HIV Health InfoLine (by Project Inform) 1-888-HIV-INFO (1-888-448-4636)
Non-judgmental volunteer operators listen to callers, share their own stories and provide calm, clear and encouraging information about HIV disease and its care.
National Association of People With AIDS Hotline: 1-240-247-0880
To find HIV Testing Centers 1-800 CDC-INFO (1-800-232-4636).
Women Alive: 1-800-554-4876 International: 1-323-965-1564
A national hotline staffed by HIV-positive women. Geared for HIV-positive women who would like peer support or treatment information. Spanish speaking operators are available.
An independent, national 501 (c)(3) organization dedicated to helping federally and commercially insured people living with life-threatening, chronic and rare diseases with the out-of-pocket costs for their prescribed medications.
A national anti-trafficking hotline serving victims and survivors of human trafficking and the anti-trafficking community in the United States. The toll-free hotline is available to answer calls from anywhere in the country, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, every day of the year in more than 200 languages.
Hotline: 1-888-373-7888
Text: 233733
Kids Hotlines:
Phone Friend: 1-602-253-9099. Phone line for school-age home alone children.
Good Days is a non-profit advocacy organization that provides resources for life-saving and life-extending treatments to people in need of access to care.
Provides emotional support, technical advice, and information to current victims of online abuse. It has served over 5,000 victims of nonconsensual pornography (NCP), recorded sexual assault (RSA) and sextortion.
Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD): 1-800-223-6233.
Disabled Parents: 1-623-872-3822
Covenant House Crisis Line for youth, teen and families: 1-800-999-9999
Pediatric Health Hotlines:
HealthWell Foundation
The HealthWell Foundation provides financial assistance to eligible individuals to cover coinsurance, copayments, health care premiums and deductibles for certain medications and therapies. They have a pediatric assistance fund regardless of disease.
The Julia’s Wings Foundation (JWF) is a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization with the mission of providing assistance to families of children with the life threatening hematological diseases; aplastic anemia, MDS, and PNH.
Call: (860) 355-3653
Email info@juliaswings.org
Pet Loss Hotlines:
US Pet Loss Hotlines:C.A.R.E. Pet Loss Helpline – (877) 394-CARE (2273)
Thursday’s Child’s National Youth Advocacy Hotline at 1-800-USA KIDS
National Hotline for Missing and Exploited Children: 1-800-843-5678
National Runaway Switchboard: 1-800-621-4000
Child Find of America Hotline: 1-800-I-AM-LOST (1-800-426.5678)
CONFIDENTIAL Runaway Hotline: 1-800-231-6946
Parent Abduction Hotline: 1-800-292-9688
Self-Injury Hotlines:
National Self-Injury Hotline: 1-800-DONT CUT (1-800-366-8288)
Service Animal Hotlines:
Access to public places with a service dog and other rights under the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA): Department of Justice at (800) 514-0301; TTY (800) 514-0383;
Housing with a Service Animal: Department of Housing and Urban Development at (202) 708-1112; TTY (202) 708-1455;
Traveling with a Service Animal: Department of Transportation at (202) 366-4000
Bringing your Service Animal to Work: Job Accommodation Network, a free service of the Office of Disability Employment Policy of the Department of Labor, at (800) 526-7234
We are a group of volunteers with comprehensive sex education providing accurate, non-judgmental, confidential information about sexuality, gender, and relationships.
The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 25.
We are a group of volunteers with comprehensive sex education providing accurate, non-judgmental, confidential information about sexuality, gender, and relationships.
The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 25.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline provides free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals.
Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week via phone and online chat.
Lifeline Chat is a service of the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, connecting individuals with counselors for emotional support and other services via web chat
Chat is available 24/7 across the U.S.
National Adolescent Suicide Hotline: 1-800-621-4000Boys Town Suicide and Crisis Line: 1-800-448-3000 or 1-800-448-1833 (TDD)
The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 25.
The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 25.
The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) Youth Talkline provides telephone, online private one-to-one chat and email peer-support, as well as factual information and local resources for cities and towns across the United States.
For teens and young adults up to age 25
1-800-246-7743
Hotline hours are Monday thru Friday from 1pm to 9pm, pacific time
Peovides telephone peer-support, as well as factual information and local resources for our senior community. No matter where they live, LGBT seniors have a place to call when they need peer-support, information and local resources.
1-888-234-7243
Hotline hours are Monday thru Friday from 1pm to 9pm, pacific time
Saturday from 9am to 2pm, pacific time
Children’s National Medical Center Gender and Sexuality Advocacy and Education: (202) 884-2504
