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I’m 21 years old with dermatillomania.  I’ve had the habit for as long as I can remember, and it was when I was around 16 that it began to get severe. Since then my life has been a roller coaster because of my skin picking. I am thankful for the times when my problem has been under control and manageable. But the good times seem to always come to an end when I let myself down again and again by covering my face, arms, back, chest, and shoulders with sores, scabs, and scars.

I love the beach.  I love to surf, and play around in the sun and salt water. I’ve lived half my life in Hawaii and now I live in California. But I’m so disgusted with myself most the time that I can’t even look at my back in the mirror, let alone wear a bikini in public. I wish I could do what I love without having this burden…

I’m running out of excuses to friends and boyfriends of why I can’t hang out, go surfing, or hookup, and I know I’m losing most, if not all of them because of it. It’s so frustrating, time after time… I wish I could just hibernate until my skin heals. It’s really causing me to hate life right now when I should be enjoying it like a normal 21 year old.

It’s really my one and only problem.. Besides dermatillomania, I have a lot going for me. I’m young, pretty, athletic, loving parents, a dog, friends and cute boys that like me (for now until we drift apart), school, a good job, but this problem is SO prominent that it is destroying every single aspect of my life. I really want to overcome this, but each time I relapse into picking again I lose more and more hope that I ever will.