by Band Back Together | Oct 2, 2015 | Baby Loss, Miscarriage, Spotlight On Baby Loss, Stillbirth |
“A person’s a person,
no matter how small.”
Dr. Seuss
October is a special month for us here at The Band. Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and other types of baby loss and child loss affect families every day. Too many people suffer silently through the devastating loss. For those going through it, we want you to know, your little ones matter.
October 15th, is Pregnancy, Infant and Child Loss Remembrance Day.
On that day, our Remembrance Wall will go up. We want all our little ones to be remembered. Please send us a comment or an email to bandbacktogether@gmail.com so that we can abide with you and remember your little one(s) as our own. Today, and every day, our hearts ache for those tables forever missing one.
As we go through this month, we want to hear your stories. Stories of miscarriage. Of babies born still, still born. Of baby and child loss. This is your month and there is no story too small.
Our other loss families need to hear your stories.
Please share how your losses have affected you. There is strength in numbers and comfort in knowing you are not alone.
We remember.
If you’d like to add your baby’s name to our Wall of Remembrance, please fill this out so we can properly remember your lost little one.
by Band Back Together | Oct 1, 2015 | Fear, Self Injury, Stress, Teen Self Injury |
There are some days where I feel like telling someone about my cutting. There we times where I am standing next to my parents or teacher and wanting to tell them but I chicken out. I think I am afraid of the consequences of how people might react or what will happen after I tell them.
Please, if you have any knowledge or experience of self harm, answer these questions:
How do I know if what I am doing is cutting or self harm?
How do I finally tell someone I am cutting?
How do I know if I am cutting for attention?
Thank you guys so much for the support. Last time I posted, I was ten days clean from cutting (if what I’m doing really is cutting). Sadly, I cannot boast this anymore. I am under 15, and going through a lot of the stress that comes with 8th grade and high school. Two days ago, I cut small lines in to my skin from the beginning of my hip to just below my ribs. I can tell you that I had one hell of a time not showing the cuts when changing during PE. Please answer my questions or give advice.
by Band Back Together | Sep 30, 2015 | Addiction, Addiction Recovery, Anger, Incarceration |
July 1st, 2015
To me, recovery is something one person takes to heart to better him or herself and breaks away from the chains of addiction. It is far from playing with someone’s emotions and feelings in front of a group. When a person in a professional position picks apart a person’s flaws in front of the whole group, then this person is not taking that individual’s recovery seriously. Assigning 500 word essays that are not related to my recovery is no more than an abuse of power.
Here at this correctional facility, my recovery is a joke. It is nothing more than a waste of tax payers’ money. This is the wrong setting to break the chains of someone’s addiction. If you have someone in a professional position acting unprofessionally, how is that helping with recovery? All it does is push me to the point of anger and attitude, which just triggers my addiction.
I know that when I finally do leave here and go home, my recovery was not taken seriously. I will be going out that front gate worse than when I came in because of the way I was treated as a human being. I have come to realize that recovery is not the priority of this system. Instead, it is a way to condition me to be a failure. That will make me come back here, keeping the money rolling in, so everyone can receive their paychecks.
To me, my recovery is much more important than someone else’s paycheck. This DWI program is not allowing me to be honest. It is teaching me to lie, wasting money on teachings that are just common sense. I feel like this program is like forcing a horse to drink water. If I do not do this program, then I max out and lose all my good time. If I want my freedom, I am forced to be in this program, even though it isn’t helping me.
All I know is that my recovery goes far beyond this program, and I need real help.
by Band Back Together | Sep 28, 2015 | Coping With Domestic Abuse, Divorce, Domestic Abuse |
I got married when I was 25. I was heavily involved in a church and was considering ministry. I made a decision to follow my hormones instead of the ministry. I was dating a lady who I knew was not the one. Then I found who I thought was the one. She was dating a good friend. He moved out of the area, and I was right there behind him. Note that this was 1982, not just a few years ago.
We were planning to get married in October of 1983. My family was there, and her family came in also. The wedding day came and her father told me, “Son if I were you, I would not go through with this.” I said, “Now now, my family is in town, you guys are here, we are doing this.”
Two days later I had a can of soup thrown at me.
The marriage did not improve much from there.
After a couple years of misery, I thought, “How about having a kid!” Wow, I must have fallen off the train or something. We had a child in 1986. I spent more time in a hotel than at home.
Divorce came in 1991, and the lies started in the courts. “He makes X dollars.” I proved I didn’t, but they did not believe me. They said I forged my paycheck and tax documents. I went along with it because I wanted my child to have a good life. That was nice.
She kept up and would not let me into his life at all. The courts sided with her. She tried to get me fired! Why? I was paying her exorbitant child support!
That is Part One of my crazy story!
by Band Back Together | Sep 27, 2015 | Chronic Neuropathic Pain, Health, Pain And Pain Disorders |
In 2003, I had my beautiful, gorgeous and sweet baby, 3 weeks early and after 5 days (yes, 5 days) of labour. As you can well imagine, when I got to the hospital (which also happened to be my birthday) I had been in labour for 4 days. I was tired, my blood pressure was going up and it was time to get her out. Physically, she was fine, so there were no worries about my daughter.
My back felt bruised, swollen and unsteady and I had had an epidural with her birth, but I assumed that it would go away. I went back to work ten days later as I worked for myself. Three months later – I still felt unsteady. My spine felt tender and I was getting concerned. I was out for a walk with my 120 pound dog, toddler and infant. My toddler ran out in the street and I went to scoop her up. It felt like I had been shot.
My legs went out and I was in white-hot blinding pain. It took me almost forty-five minutes to get home from my usual five minute walk. I managed to get us into my bedroom, shut the door and call my husband.
That was the beginning.
Since then I have had several occasions when I can’t walk, migraine headaches, insomnia, burning pain, loss of function of my hands and face, numbness, electrical shocks, cramping, shooting pain. Currently, I am technically un-diagnosed and am floating around the system. It is awful, but I have seen and know people who have had worse. I have done numerous different therapies, medications, tests, and seven years later, I have no answers and am still in pain.
Losing some friends and family; it has made me want to create an enhanced awareness about Pain Patients.
We are treated like pariahs, criminals, junkies, nut-jobs and the like. We are misunderstood, misdiagnosed, dismissed, referred-out and judged. Pain is invisible and the human brain will delete the actual physical memory of pain. Pain is different for everyone, making it difficult to relate. What is bad for one is nothing to another.
I want to increase understanding and acceptance from the Medical Profession that we are real people, with real problems, with real pain. The Health Care System needs to be properly educated on Pain Medication, Pain Management and Treatment for pain. So that there is hope out there for us.
We need to be heard and recognized.
Thanks for building this site for all of us Painies!!
